One of the best techniques to generate awareness is projection.
Indeed, in a conflict we naturally tend to protect ourselves by forming a sort of barricade around our own opinion or point of view, in order to defend and justify ourselves.
However, if we can put ourselves in the other’s shoes and imagine the same conversation but from the other’s point of view, we get a complete picture of the situation and thus can propose an appropriate response.
First and foremost, you have to know and care about the person in order to put yourself in his or her shoes. If we do not know his world, how could we project ourselves into it?
For example, to project the other is to ask him: Imagine if you were in my place and I told you what you just told me with the same tone. How would you feel? Would you like it? How would you have reacted?
The fact that the person transposes himself or herself into the universe of the other allows him or her to instantly feel and understand what the other has perceived and why he or she may have reacted in this way, offering a global analysis of the scene.
It is then that awareness is made, stimulated by empathy and emotional intelligence, lowering these barricades and allowing true communication to take hold.
Once you have become aware, you have a new perspective. A new understanding and evolution. As if you could see further and wider now.
The projection makes it possible to record emotionally and therefore durably a situation, as when we reframe an employee. Without projecting the person, it will be difficult for him or her to really realize the importance of his error but also the importance of the role he has to play, thus risking the error to be repeated.
Practice by putting yourself in the shoes of an acquaintance, friend or family member. Imagine your day-to-day life with the stress and the situations this person finds itself in on a daily basis.
Do you feel you understand her or him better? Do you understand her or his reactions, emotions or mood better?
Now that you have transposed yourself, I am sure that you will no longer react in the same way to conflicts with this person, except in a more empathetic way.
Let us be benevolent.